Toddling through Tuesday: 15 months

Last week was Ariel's 15 month check up, just the standard one with her pediatrician. The appointment went well - though we spent 2 hours waiting. Our doctor was at the hospital in town and they weren't sure when she would return, so they let us wait.

The wait was the only negative of the visit. I really like our doctor and prefer to see her over others in the group, so I didn't mind waiting. However, the nurse put us in an exam room, had me undress Ariel, did all the standard measurements, reminded me to leave Ariel undressed for the doctor's exam, and THEN told me that the doctor was at the hospital and might leave in 15 minutes (then it would be another 15 minutes before she arrived and probably 10 more before she would see us). She said I could just step into the hall when I felt the wait was too much and a nurse would get another dr in to see Ariel. This sounded fine for a moment then she left and then it wasn't so good. I wondered, "How long will it take for another doctor to be available to see Ariel after I request one?" and of course, you never know if you had waited 10 more minutes if you would have seen your doctor. Anyhow, I never got my answers cause I never asked. We waited and waited and waited. It was over an hour before the doctor arrived.

Ariel handled it really well. Not perfectly, but she isn't terribly fond of medical situations for a few reasons. One, sitting on the table seems to remind her of the ultrasounds she gets every three months. We have to hold her down and keep her still and it is not a pleasant experience for a child her age. Two, she also seems to remember that she gets shots a lot there. I say this because she smiles and interacts very comfortably with our doctor, but freaks out whenever a nurse is near. The nurses always give the shots.

So how's our girl doing? All is well according to the doctor. She weighs 28.4 lbs. She's only above the 95th percentile for weight now...up to now she's always been above the 97th. Yay! I can really see a difference in her face and she doesn't have nearly as many rolls. She is 30.5 inches long (or tall). She's staying pretty steady here as well around the 62th percentile. Her head circumference looks good too though I don't recall the exact measurement. She seems to be making good progress with communication skills, motor skills, etc.

There was only one thing we have to follow up on: she needs a consultation with a pediatric eye doctor. Nothing major just a minor concern. Her specialist actually noticed it months ago, but said to talk to the pediatrician first because its so minor (and she could see the exact same issue in me - and I've never had any issues).

I have a confesion. I had to fill out a sheet about what she is doing like eye contact, pointing, number of words, understanding, etc. I do not like these worksheets because the questions are kinda specific. I have issues with what others think of me and measuring up and apparently these questions bring this out in me. I lied on the sheet for two questions. Ok so that's a bit of an exageration, but I felt like I lied (or didn't measure up as a mom). They ask how many blocks she is stacking. I said 1-2. However, she doesn't care about her blocks let alone stacking them. She like to bang them together and knock them over, but she doesn't want to build. She can put things on things. I felt like this was the essence of the question, so I said 1-2; but I still felt guilty. We came right home and focused on stacking blocks. She did finally stack a few blocks when we were at Jason's parents' house this weekend. Whew. I also felt guilty about the body part pointing question (does she point to parts of her body when asked to?). This was my fault completely. We don't do it much. I forgot to focus on it. Bad mom. I knew she could point to specific things when asked to, so I said she did this "sometimes." Right there in the office, I started working on pointing to her nose with intensity. She can do it now. She can point to my nose, her nose, my mouth, her mouth, my eyes, her eyes, and my ears. Probably more too, but you get the idea. I don't feel as bad anymore, especially since she picked them both up so quickly.

But, still, in reality, I think I lied. I don't like that. I can say I was answering the essence of the question with truth, but that isn't good enough for my conscience. I was more worried about them saying she was behind in some area or thinking I wasn't teaching her well than committed to being completely honest and transparent. God asks me for honesty and I failed to give it. I'm not making more out of this than it is, but I do feel convicted to recognize and try to correct this tendency in myself.

I love my little girl. It is such an adventure to be a mom. I'm learning so much about life. It's a stretching experience and sometimes it is trying in all honesty. But isn't everything? Maybe that's just me. More of my perfectionism coming out. Sorry about the long winded post...if you are still reading it. Heehee.